as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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