so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
