Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
