Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
