He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
