She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
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