i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
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