So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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