I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
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