lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
