Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
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