dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
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