were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
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