I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Randomize
