We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
