So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Randomize
