Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
