Plan B is the new Plan A
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Randomize
