those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Randomize
