how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
