the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
