yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
Randomize
