at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
