Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Randomize
