Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
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