By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Randomize
