I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
Randomize
