Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Randomize
