Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
