dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
Princesses don't give blow jobs
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
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