I hate all girls vehemently.
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
