i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Randomize
