Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
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