You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Every concussion has its silver lining
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
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