Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
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