I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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