I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
NoShamevember. You game?
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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