Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
