so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
