I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
