Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Randomize