seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
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