the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
