its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Randomize
