Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
It's official drugs can't kill me
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
Randomize
