Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
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I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
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Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
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