shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
