Make note: the first date is too soon to make the "condoms are only for making balloon animals" joke.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
Randomize
