Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
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