dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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