nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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